‘Because Bed Wettin’ Bad Boys was already taken!
As they so eloquently put it, the band was born from a few early kicks at the rock ’n’ roll can (most notably Ex-Humans who have some solid output you should definitely track down) and raised on the disdain for a city “on the verge of totally fucked” according to the collective brain-trust, adding, “you probably shouldn’t waste your time [there] unless you’re rich or wanna buncha yuppie posers bumping into you on their way to ‘work.’” Well, with that delightfully cheery disposition, they are “definitely stoked and honoured to be in such good company on In The Red Records” as members Carl “C-Bone” Cirone (groans/beats bone axe/destroys toys), Jordan “Hitch” Lovelace (plays whammy-gar), Jesse “Martinez” Crawford (baritone grumbler) and Peter “Peanut” Buxton (slaps ceramic skins) have only been at it a couple of years into their mind-altering musical “career” - already these boyz in the hood are making fast friends with their self-professed “thug pop”, snuggling up to punk rock royalty like the Gizmos and the country-fied psych crew of The Men.
Speaking of, Ben Greenberg of the aforementioned combo helped record and produce Pampers’ debut LP released last year and totally nailed their otherworldly racket of gunk punk, chock full of slashing guitar breaks, furious drum pummeling and bowel-moving bass riffage. However, you can put your secret decoder rings ripped from the bottom of your breakfast cereal box away, as mine failed to solve any mysteries of life in their lyrics. In fact, when prodded to uncover any detail into the meaning of their madness, I turned to their newest EP for ITR (due out by the time you read this) and the song “Suicide”. If this was indeed a song about ending one’s existence, how would choose to go and what would be your exit number? “My coffin shall be played at my funeral next year,” declares the “voice” of Pampers, “with a glass of warm water and dirty wet finger nubs”.
No time to waste then music lovers, we must now make haste to catch their death-defying show which is currently crisscrossing America with the equally mesmerizing OBN III’s, led by daredevil ringleader and band namesake Orville Bateman Neely III. Are they worried about being upstaged by these mischievous merry-makers? “Oh we def stage it - in, on and offstage it, even backstage it!” they enthusiastically exclaim, which I can only assume to be what the kids of today call “droppin’ science” or alternately some rad new skateboarding tricks are going to be unleashed from their already lethal arsenal of flash-and crash stage antics. But what of another powerhouse performance set to take place across town on the same night here in Raincouver – are they fearful the godfathers of grunge will steal their sunshine? Self-assured and smarmy is the Pampers reply: “Never heard of Mudhumpy…are they a band or something? Who cares, there’s gonna be at least one suicide take place across town the very same night. Swing by, let’s end it!” See Pampers try to maximize their kill count onstage with OBN III’s.
The Pampers perform at the Electric Owl Nov. 22.
By Bryce Dunn
